POEM: 13 APRIL 2010
by Greg ~ April 14th, 2010. Filed under: Poems.Shortest day
the morning is so dark
it’s like
a flat screen TV on standby
the afternoon is so dark
it’s as though
the day is switched off at the wall.
Greg O’Connell © 2010
Shortest day
the morning is so dark
it’s like
a flat screen TV on standby
the afternoon is so dark
it’s as though
the day is switched off at the wall.
Greg O’Connell © 2010
April 14th, 2010 at 10:24 am
Greg, lovely stuff you’ve been working on– I love the ending line on this one. There’s something simultaneously adult and childlike happening here, with the light switch implication.Thanks for the read.
April 14th, 2010 at 11:09 am
This is Shakespearean! That last line is destined, I’m sure, to seep into the language. In years to come people will say ‘the day is switched off at the wall’ and not realise it’s a metaphor, in the same way they say things like ‘you broke my heart.’
April 14th, 2010 at 11:38 am
the simplicity lends a lot greg to the story you are telling.. like the idea of switching off a day… poem…
April 14th, 2010 at 12:16 pm
Clever!
April 14th, 2010 at 12:58 pm
Like the conciseness of this…while you still get your point out. Also liked the idea of switching off the day.
April 14th, 2010 at 1:00 pm
I really like the simplicity and the imagery of this poem. Great work!
April 14th, 2010 at 1:43 pm
So simple, but the similes are really strong. They speak to our “flat screen” obsessed world.
April 14th, 2010 at 2:34 pm
Never thought of it this way but it’s perfect! Thanks for the cool image!
April 16th, 2010 at 2:58 pm
Lovely metaphor – although I’m not sure I want to think about the shortest day coming, when we are enjoying such beautiful autumn weather !